Wave As It Goes

Blog blog blog. Hello blog. Long time no see.

Fall semester 2012 is over. Phew. What a whirlwind.

Ups downs and in betweens I am so incredibly blessed to be living the life I live. Some days were awful but others were so incredible that words cannot describe them and I am so thankful for both scenarios. Growth has occurred all over the place and I’m excited about it.

Now onto to preparing for studying abroad. Wait what? Ready. Set. Go.

Don't Let the World Harden You

The other day I was starting to feel really down and not as happy as I usually am and I didn't know what to do or how to act. I was starting to feel trapped in my own body. However, thanks to my run, I came to the conclusion that I was letting the world get to me and letting it influence me negatively. Going running serves as a great place for provoking thoughts and brainstorming for me. This particular run helped to remind me how beautiful this world is and how much beauty each of us has to give. It is very easy for all of us to be our best/worst critic. We know all of our downfalls better than anyone else. We must, however, not focus on those downfalls in a negative manner we must build on them and learn from them -- incorporate them into the landscape, so to speak. We must stand resistant to the sad ways of the world; instead we should embrace the beauty which it contains and help to showcase it. I beg you to believe in the beauty of your dreams, believe in the beauty of yourself and all that you have to share with the world.

You Can't Force Passion

The other day while helping out at my Dad's veterinary clinic I had a client ask me if I was going to be a veterinarian too. I responded by saying something along the lines of, "No I don't plan on it, you have to have a passion for it and you can't force passion." The words just came out of my mouth. I had never established that thought before in my mind but it made me realize how true my statement was. You can't force passion. Everyone has their own special passions.
Sometimes I catch myself being jealous of others passions and wishing that I have the same talents and passions as them. A classic case of the "grass is greener on the other side" syndrome.
For me my passions are works in progress and I have to accept that and be ok with it. I'm still figuring out what I am truly passionate about and I will figure it out with time and faith in God's plan for me.

Achey Breaky Heart

A recent thought gone wild:
The aches of our hearts are so unable to be described yet they are there. The deep aches have been formed and rooted from time. These aches have roots that are layers of complexity that take time to form and even longer to uproot and set our hearts free. We yearn for love and we try to satisfy that yearning in a lot of different ways - a lot of which result in a loss of love and deeper entrapment, not freedom we are searching for.  To be free we must be in love with the Lord. Setting our hearts free means peeling back, untangling and pulling away from all of the entrapments we have placed within and on our delicately beautiful hearts. Through Jesus' help we must set forth on a journey of breaking down to be rebuilt in a new greater love. Like all good things our blood, sweat and tears must go into this process. We must persevere in our efforts having faith that the Lord is by our side lifting the entrapments with us. Holding onto the hope of what is to come must be our constant fuel. Through devoutly loving our God, ourselves and our neighbors we will be successful.

The Summer Blues

I need structure. I like having a schedule; something to keep me focused. I thrive on staying busy and jumping from one thing to the other.

In the summer I enjoy the freedom and chance to relax. However, this summer I've been experiencing a roller coaster of emotions. I go from being super happy about being home with my family and old friends to being super sad and feeling alone without being at school with my friends there.
The lack of structure has also been not so beneficial for me. I tried to find jobs but alas, no one was hiring. So, without a set plan of what each day is going to be I have been failing to do much of anything.
Now is the time to reform my ways and give myself goals and tasks to accomplish! Let's hope I can follow through and keep on keepin' on. 

Sacrifice

sacrifice |ˈsakrəˌfīs|noun• an act of giving up something valued for the sake of something else regarded as more important or worthy: we must all be prepared to make sacrifices.• Christian Church Christ's offering of himself in the Crucifixion.• Christian Church the Eucharist regarded either (in Catholic terms) as a propitiatory offering of the body and blood of Christ or (in Protestant terms) as an act of thanksgiving.ORIGIN Middle English: from Old French, from Latin sacrificium; related to sacrificus ‘sacrificial,’ from sacer ‘holy.’
Lately I have been struck by the lack of appreciation my generation has for sacrifice. I am in no way saying that I am the ultimate expert on sacrifice or that I do not falter and wish for life to be without sacrifice. It is  just not something that many people think about but sacrifice is an essential part of every day life and leads us to be better versions of ourselves. There are multiple examples throughout the world and history of how first enduring unpleasant things allows us to fully appreciate the great joy that is to come. Look at the seasons for example, we must first go through the cold dead winter before we can experience the green lively spring. Although the winter may appear dead to some it is still beautiful in its own way and allows for the earth to go through the cycle of life and death to prepare for the spring. Coming from this season of Lent we also see that in order to get to Easter and enjoy the glory of Jesus rising from the dead we much cleanse ourselves by sacrificing things we regard as important to prepare for someone much more important, Jesus Christ.
More reflection on this to come.

My Old Kentucky Home

This time coming home from school I have been noticing all the little things that make home so special and why I truly love coming home so very much. So, i figured i should document the various things that stood out to me with in the first 24 hours of being home. 

          

The first thing I noticed is, the excitement and happiness that overcomes me every time I spy a Kentucky license plate on another car never cease to amaze me. No matter where I am seeing one of them makes me super happy. So, as you can imagine, when I come home from school  (where I mainly see Ohio, West Virginia and Pennsylvania license plates) the excitement once we cross into Kentucky and I realize everywhere I look I can see a little blue and white piece of metal that says Kentucky on it is overwhelming. Who knew that such a simple thing could bring anyone such joy? I guess I am a little strange but, it's more than just the object that brings me joy -- it's the implications that go with it. It's knowing that whoever is in that car knows what it's like to be a Kentuckian. It's the pride that comes along with being from such a great state. It's the knowing that because I see the plates I am so close to being home and surrounded by my family, etc. etc. We're all a part of the United States of America but, we each have our state that we live. The place we grew up. The places we've been that help to define who we are. The simple license plate screams to the world a small piece of information that could help to explain a lot about a person. I just really enjoy it. Maybe I have over thought it and taken it too far but I don't care.  I will relish the luxury of being surrounded by my fellow Kentuckians for now.

Another sight that brings immense joy to my heart is the sight of my street sign. When I drive around the bend and the sign comes into view my heart becomes giddy. I have lived on  this road my entire life and it holds such history and memories that I can't help but smile from ear to ear when I approach it and get to drive down it.

Being home is such a good feeling. I also truly enjoyed being out of the cafeteria for a couple reasons. One, home cooked food is just the best. Two, getting to pray before dinner with my family and say our litany of prayers is something I miss. Three, knowing my dishes are clean and not having to smell the nasty dishwasher room. Four, the quiet.

I also thoroughly enjoyed being able to watch the University of Kentucky basketball game in the comfort of our living room. Home is not home without the wildcats making their presence in one way or another. It's simply the way it is in my family and I am totally fine with that. I enjoy the obsession and devotion.

These are the simple things that first stuck out to me other than basking in the presence of my family, getting to shower in my own bathroom, and sleep in my own bed! I can't wait to experience more of the joys of home throughout this week!